As parents we get our first significant introduction to the world of waiting when we initially go to visit our obstetrician. If he/she has a delivery we have to wait until they come back and so appointments can take minutes or hours.
When our bundle of joy arrives we wait for them to feed, to poop and especially to fall asleep so that we can remember what it is like to be a grown up again.
As our children grow the nature of our waiting changes—- We wait to collect them from school, we wait for them to finish swimming class, drama class, music class, and all the other activities that we bring them to as we endeavour to be the best parents that we can be and give them as many opportunities as we possibly can.
In some cases we need to drop them and just wait around until they are finished which may be anything from 20 minutes to over and hour. As busy parents this is very valuable time and it is really useful to be aware of how we use this time so that we avoid a build up of frustration around waiting.
Here are some strategies that I have used myself or seen others use and each in their own way have meant that the parents have used the time with purpose and have learned to treat waiting time as a gift.
1) One mum finished work at 2:00 but didn’t have enough time to really do anything before collecting her child from school at 3:00. So each day she would head to the school straight from work and lose herself in a book for 45-50 minutes. She was delighted to have reading time.
2) I managed to have my daughter’s ballet class in the centre of the city and used the hour to indulge my love of window shopping each week totally guilt free.
3) A number of mums would drop their sons for a warm up 30 minutes before a match and do circuits of the pitch before matches started.
4) For years I have done my weekly shopping during my son’s rugby training (with time to spare).
5) At my children’s primary school there are a number of mums who meet up about 10 minutes before school is out for a quick chat and give and receive support from each other.
Most importantly I have known some parents to take the time waiting to just do nothing other than breathe.
As parents waiting for our children, we need to be mindful of our own frustrations. Our children pick up on these frustrations at an emotional level and may avoid the activities in order to avoid seeing us frustrated. When we make the process positive for ourselves our children equally pick up on that too.
Mary Corbett is a founder of ParentingClub2014, Mum of 2, and Life and Business coachwww.marycorbettcoaching.com with a passionate belief in people
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